The First in 2015

I spent the better part of a week in late December 2014 imagining my life for the next year. I was trying to list down what others called as 'resolutions'. But I didn't like that name and mostly that are broken after January 5. You know. My family, some close friends, and even myself recognize I am as a rough daily schedule maker. Not a creator of a map for the year ahead. All I can do best just mumbling and writing overall outline of what matters to me. And maybe those written words will take me to achieve it soon or later. So I wrote this.

For me, 2014 was the tail-end of a learning process what I don't want to be doing in my future. Especially in my career. And also the start of actually doing the stuff I think I am here to do. I've experimented with alternative ways to earn living. And I feel confident!

But it was also messy and uneasy. Still I've experienced self-doubt and inability to focus. It left me a bit mentally bumpy. That was the year I've started invest myself for what I believe as my truly joy; traveling. But on the flip side, there is always sacrifice to pay.

I'm moving to Australia next month.

Never I have felt so free. Yet never I have felt so powerless. Oh goodness. Maybe I'm exaggerate. But it would be my first time live abroad just by myself. I'm facing the chance to find a world that I've never seen before and also the opportunity to know myself better. So exciting! But on a new corner where I don't know any soul...that's terrifying.

However I wrote this as a reminder to myself. Australia can be a new chapter of the rest of my life. Who'd known?

I'm hoping I can make 2015 a meaningful and interesting year. Read more books, write more words, create more artworks, and tell more stories. I want to be good but I won't let me afraid to make mistakes. I want to create a beautiful monster in and out myself. I'll try and I mean it.


I wish everyone will make it a good one as well! Cheers!